It started as a normal day…but don’t they all?
I was in the kitchen preparing my post-workout snack,
listening to the radio as usual when the midday announcer said
there was a breaking news report of someone having been found unconscious at Paisley Park,
of an “as yet unknown identity”.
My heart dropped and the praying began to please let it not be him,
knowing full well it was and hoping he would be alright once he received medical attention.
He had been ill within the last few weeks.
I fired up my laptop and went on the hunt for news on the mainstream sites
as well as those which specialize in celebrity gossip –
about twenty to thirty minutes later it was confirmed that Prince was gone from this earth.
The tears started with a trickle.
(Over the course of the day I experienced full on Scarlett O’Hara crying bouts –
just short of flinging myself onto the bed or rolling around on the shower walls –
short outbursts but very intense nonetheless,
at home, in the car – unpredictable – for weeks.
Truth told, I’m still getting misty occasionally.)
The text messages started pouring in from friends wishing me well
and offering their condolences.
I sent only one notification to someone whose work
and particular brand of focus generally has them up
and at it very early in the day.
I knew they hadn’t heard and needed to know.
The response mirrored my own –
Disbelief and an expletive.
By nightfall, I had gathered all of my Prince music together and went on a mad mixtape binge,
creating moods of the day compilations and editing for several days
until I got them as right as possible, some still need tweaks.
I also went on the hunt for a few items missing from my collection.
Additionally, I ordered all of the publications which did special Prince editions,
Newsweek, Time, Rolling Stone, Billboard.
I sent my cousin in search of a New Yorker magazine,
which I credit for having the most moving cover,
just purple rain and an empty mic stand…
She couldn’t find one for sale anywhere in five boroughs.
(Mid-May, a colleague delivered to me a copy of the People magazine
and TWO New Yorker Magazines,
“one to read, and one to treasure”, they said.)
It’s not as if I knew Prince personally, but I did.
It’s not as if he knew me, but he did.
I’ve been a member of just about every official Prince fan club that ever existed.
When he was able to take his clubs to the internet,
we gained access to the music instantly,
got those inside looks at photos and videos,
invitations to intimate gatherings at Paisley Park and other small venues,
and those fan club seats at concerts.
That’s where I and other people like me spent some personal time with him.
At some point, Prince looked each and every person in those sections in the eye and for more than a glance.
It’s as if he wanted to know you.
Sometimes he’d talk to you,
or laugh with you,
read your mind and comment,
or imitate your dance move.
Prince was cool like that.
Also, I did have an opportunity back in 1984, by way of my job,
to be less than 10 feet away from him
during a Marva Collins Benefit at the Sheraton-Woodley Park Hotel,
nothing between us but the rope and stanchions declaring his table VIP.
Of course I couldn’t make my lips move and
while I was staring at him, he was staring back at me.
Best eye contact EVER (except for maybe that time with LL Cool J in Los Angeles. HOT!!)
The most telling thing about this close encounter is the event was not publicized.
Our newsdesk had gotten information about it and we could only hope to record his arrival.
Cameras were not going to be allowed inside the venue.
He was in town for The Purple Rain Tour.
He remained in town for a few days having made arrangements to attend this function
(as well as giving a free concert for students at Gallaudet University
which primarily services the deaf and hard of hearing, another unpublicized stop.)
Because of the era, television crew personnel communicated via walkie-talkie.
I was inside doing recon and the two-man crew was at the front door.
The best part of the night was hotel security thinking I was with Prince security
(likely because of my outfit and hairdo)
and Prince security thinking I was working for the hotel
(because of the walkie-talkie). Ha!!
That’s the only reason our station got him walking into the event
after so much back and forth over which entrance he’d use.
Somebody from the hotel actually just leaned over and said to me,
“he’s coming in the other way now”.
I nodded and got on the radio to tell my crew.
We got the shot.
Then, with the crew acting like they didn’t know me
when I escorted them to the door as if they were being ejected,
I parlayed my new-found acceptance into a trip down the escalator,
into the ballroom,
and right up to the velvet rope.
Looking back, I probably could have feigned some need
to ask him a “security related” question —
maybe something like “who’s gonna stop me from kidnapping you?” —
(That feels so Leslie Jones! Ha!!)
but I was happy just getting close enough for a good look at a genius.
Truth be told, over the years of my career, I’ve met a lot of people I wish I hadn’t met.
Sometimes, it’s better not to know that someone you admire is a real a-hole.
I’m just saying…
I don’t think this would have been the case with Prince in 1984.
(or anytime for that matter)
Here he was at that age,
at that super high point in his career,
giving of himself already.
Nothing about that says jerk.
Let me tell you up front,
if you’re not a fan, I’m not angling to make you become one right now.
I’ll be the first to admit,
I drank the kool-aid and ate the ice when it came to Prince
and I’m not ashamed of it.
This is likely going to be more cathartic for me than informative for you,
but in my attempt at closure
I’m going to try to open your eyes to some things you may not know.
He was very special.
Over the years, Prince has been described as weird among other things –
didn’t bother him of course,
just made him act out even more I think.
People almost always criticize or ridicule what they don’t understand or can’t embrace.
Even Tidal, the streaming service that had an exclusive deal with Prince,
released a headline some weeks ago announcing the addition of “15 of Prince’s weirdest albums”
and they were in business with him.
Somehow, that didn’t seem right to me but it happened.
I saved the email.
If it wasn’t for the exclusive content factor,
my reason for even having a subscription,
I truly would have canceled on principle.
It’s in those “weirdest” albums, some of them fan club releases,
where many of his most conscious messages to society,
his poetry, and his musical genius can be found but I’ll get to that.
Prince wasn’t all Little Red Corvette, Kiss, Let’s Go Crazy and When Doves Cry.
Prince wasn’t just Purple Rain.
Since his first album, he set the bar for other musicians to meet.
While enrolled at Howard University (H.U. – You Know!),
I was a deejay at the student run station, WHBC-AM (It’s now HD).
When the first Prince album arrived,
a small group of us screened it like always and selected songs to play.
Because I was doing the first shift of the day at the time,
Noon to 3pm (The Afternoon Walk I called it),
I had the honor of dropping the needle on his album first.
Musically, my life hasn’t been the same since.
How amazing that all of that was only one man,
one very young man in fact, who could have been a classmate.
Wow! Impressive!
If he wanted to make music and there wasn’t anyone around, he’d just do it.
It wasn’t that he didn’t play well with others,
according to those basic tenets of kindergarten behavior
that go on to form the foundations of our social interactions –
it’s just that he didn’t need others to play well.
It’s no real wonder he was born under the zodiac sign of Gemini.
According to astrological circles, they come with a gift of multiplicity.
His ability to play various instruments is well documented,
but when you have an opportunity to listen to a song that’s totally Prince,
pay attention to the multi-layered background vocals, the side comments,
the extra oohs and ahhs, the syncopated clap,
be it single or a flurry that gives just the right extra rhythm.
And that’s just the music part of it.
Even while Prince was heating it up on a song to talk someone out of their clothes,
he’d still be dropping some knowledge and spitting some wisdom.
For example, on “The Greatest Romance Ever Sold (Adam and Eve Remix)”,
while you’re considering what Eve (literally, Eve the rap artist)
just said about how he’s scrambled her brain and she’s his alone for life,
Prince comes along, sees that bet and raises it.
He co-opts lyrics from a little known “Silicon” (The Slaughterhouse, 2004),
a fan club release, adds to them and puts it this way:
“One day U’ll get outside the doo-rag
When U really want 2 contemplate this jacked up
Paranormal situation that your people got into…
Can I hip U?
Long ago who considered the outcome
and figured that people like U would be troublesome
And stuck U in a mind tangling curriculum
Stations of play, remote controls in your hands,
’til they’re both numb…
bills, bills, bills…”
He goes on to talk about 40% of the fathers being absent
and then further gives a nod to how even though the senses
have been dulled by some manner of opium,
“the only tunes you seem to want to hum are platinum” –
there’s the economic power we don’t even take into consideration.
In the next breath, he’s all about the romance again,
“this is where you end and you and I begin…the greatest romance…”
In the liner notes of Rave Unto The Joy Fantastic (1999),
Prince shares with us the plight of a sheep’s life
and the horrors it would have undergone for the sake of fashion
if the fur he’s wearing wasn’t faux.
In “Ol’ Skool Company” (MPLS, 2009),
he talks about the fat cats on Wall Street getting a bailout
when the only thing that has changed in his childhood neighborhood is the calendar date.
When I heard this and had to affirm it as the case for my childhood neighborhood as well,
the only thing missing was me sitting on the porch.
In “Colonized Mind” (LotusFlower, 2009),
Prince goes through an upload/download scenario,
what you give and what you get –
among those things listed,
he describes the two-party system being an illusion of choice
resulting in nothing changing and people not having a real say.
He further describes a child with no father who then has no respect for authority
and a child with no mother having trouble showing love.
Perhaps the most poignant of all the lyrics to this song,
as they pertain to his career,
are those which talk about artists signing joint record deals
creating another way for “the man” to take your money
in exchange for your 15 minutes of fame and nothing to show for it later.
He was ALWAYS cutting new roads for his fellow artists
to get a better handle on the music industry
when it came to being personally responsible for their futures on the business end –
helping them to avoid what had happened to him.
Of course there was the part of Prince who was all about the ladies –
Even in high heels and makeup, there’s not one former wife, girlfriend, or lover who has come forward to say anything out of turn about her experiences with Prince.
From all I’ve been able to glean from his treatment of people,
he was one of those well-raised, decent,
open the car door type of Midwest gentlemen, with good taste,
who would hold your hand crossing the street, walk on the curb side,
and just happened to be pretty on top of it.
“Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful” (Prettyman, Rave in2 The Joy Fantastic, 2001)
As a matter of fact, there are several songs
in which Prince shares flat out his appreciation of a smart woman.
I was in full support of him admiring women as intelligent creatures.
To me, THAT is really sexy.
In his 1992 release “Sexy MF” (0(+>, 1992*),
while he’s expressing appreciation in an “urban” way,
in the midst of all that gangster hot beat, you hear,
“This ain’t about the body, it’s about the mind”.
He expresses his interest in getting to know her,
what she likes, even cooking for her…
going on from there to say he wants his girl
to be even smarter than him before they proceed…
That’s refreshing!
I’m in.
In spite of the colorful language in this particular song –
(and I’m calling y’all out, don’t act like you’ve never said this about some fine specimen under your breath or out loud – girls and boys alike — my people know who I’m talking to right now – all of the sexy M.F.s)
THIS is ONE of the funkiest beats in Prince’s repertoire. There are hundreds.
Actually, because of the colorful language in this song,
and the twists he put on the average things people have on their minds,
Prince was able to connect in a different way.
All of his lyrics aren’t necessarily what some would consider poetic genius.
His songs feature words from the simple to the sublime.
It’s the simplicity of the lyrics that make them sublime.
People appreciate more what appears to be something they could do too
or a person like Prince relaying your same thoughts —
only better —
and with music.
That’s why some artists become part of our personal life soundtrack.
Prince was one of those artists.
He says things like, “U know u want me like a new pair of shoes.”
(This Could B Us, Art Official Age, 2014 and HitNRun Phase One, 2015 remix)
What woman can’t relate to that?
“We could have fun just strollin’”.
(Strollin’, Diamonds and Pearls, 1991)
Just taking a walk with somebody…nice. Keep talking.
“Everytime I comb my hair, thoughts of U get in my eyes…”
(Erotic City, B-Side single release 1984, 1989, 1990, 1993, on Girl Six album, 1996)
“Ur still fine…yes you R. Like wine, you get better with time”
(Better With Time, LotusFlower, 2009)
“…I can’t wait to get you home…
where we could be alone…
I could read you poetry
And then we could make a story of our own…”
(Hot Thing, Sign O’ The Times, 1987)
Yep, still in.
“…Ur mind will never deny what Ur body knows.
I know U want to take off all Ur clothes,
But please, don’t do it.”
(Incense and Candles, 3121, 2006)
Remember – it’s about the mind
(though this particular instance seems like a little reverse psychology to me).
While we’re exploring lyrics, let me take you back a bit —
“Do you want him, or do you want me? Cause I want you!”
(The Beautiful Ones, Purple Rain, 1984)
C’mon! You know he had you at “baby, baby, baby…what’s it gonna be?” Ha!!
But then there are the times he reaches in and strokes your soul:
“In this trusting place you can erase
Every tear that ever rolled down your weary face
All the time you waste in that paper chase
Is time better spent in these arms of mine
Heaven sent angel so divine
You’re my complement
U make my sun shine…
U make my sun shine at night…
Wonderfully, truly caring
you make the words I wish in every song.
Come here now pretty baby let me take you somewhere
and put your real clothes back on
We’ve both been in the dark much too long
Now that we got the knowledge and the truth we can both be strong
Kings and Queens gettin’ it on!”
(U Make My Sun Shine featuring Angie Stone, The Chocolate Invasion, 2004)
Well, when’s the last time you heard that? When was the first time?
Loving and empowering and bringing your head back around to the kingdoms
before the “not so great migration” from the motherland, your ancestors…
your destiny.
Take a minute to think about that.
His fan base wasn’t just the female population of course.
Prince had something for everyone.
Musicians appreciated his remarkable guitar chops,
his genius capability to play as many as a reported 47 instruments, his lyrical flow.
The respect was clearly illustrated after his death.
While all of the tributes from around the globe were beautiful,
the ones most representative of Prince’s place in the world of music
were the ones from his colleagues and peers.
When the people who do what you do show that level of respect and appreciation,
you have made a difference in your industry
with the love and attention you paid to your craft.
One of the things I’ve come to treasure most is the intricacy
of his outstanding drum solo from “Shhh” (The Gold Experience, 1995)
which was masterfully duplicated in concert by John Blackwell among others.
It is a singularly amazing and remarkable solo.
It must be played at full volume
and I dare you not to air-drum while you’re listening to it.
(Sinbad opened all his shows playing it on one of his tours.)
Prince put words in the mouths of male fans who could play one of his songs and not have to speak again on a date. Just think “Adore” (Sign O’ The Times, 1987)
If that doesn’t do the trick, try “When I Lay My Hands On You”, (The Chocolate Invasion, 2004)
(but I’d advise you to find the live performance
from the Montreux Jazz Festival 2007 — the second night. That’s like money in the bank.)
One of his most underrated gifts
was his ability to make people feel good about themselves.
His music was often the ultimate pep talk.
He helped you feel great while providing pounding beats
to keep you fit and sexy on the dance floor at the same time.
He admitted in concert his having written “Cream” (Diamonds And Pearls, 1991)
while looking in the mirror one day.
“This is it. It’s time for you to go to the wire.
You will hit, ‘Cause you got the burnin’ desire.
It’s your time. You got the horn so why don’t you blow it?
You are fine. You’re filthy cute and baby you know it.
Cream, Get on top. Cream, You will cop.
Cream, Don’t you stop. Cream, Sh-boogie bop
You’re so good. Baby there ain’t nobody better.
So you should Never, ever go by the letter.
You’re so cool. Everything you do is success.
Make the rules. Then break them all ’cause you are the best.
Yes you are.”
Now that’s what I call a great wake up anthem.
As long as you’re bolstering your self esteem:
“Baby I’m a (star)
Might not know it now
Baby but I r, I’m a (star)
I don’t want to stop, ’til I reach the top
Sing it (We are all a star!)”
(Baby I’m A Star, Purple Rain, 1984)
Every time I saw Prince in concert, he left it all on the stage.
Of course we went home wanting more because fans are greedy
but not because he hadn’t given us his all.
Then, on some nights, he’d pack up the band
and go somewhere else for one of his infamous after-shows
and play another couple of hours.
During an LA finale of “Anna Stesia” (One Night Alone Live box set, 2002),
he closes the show with a request for the audience to sing the words
“Love is God, God is Love. Girls and Boys love God above”.
He says, “I played for you, can you do this for me?”
He wants them to send him home happy too.
With this boxed set, there is a third cd, The After-show.
Even if the first audience filled his needs, he just wanted to give some more.
There has been a lot of talk about how much of a private person he was.
There’s nothing wrong with that.
What good has come from telling all of your business?
Generally, the result is simply increased judgement and closer scrutiny.
After the last fan website closed, he came to the social media thing with a whisper,
first a twitter account which he closed after a time, then another one –
the one that depicted his eyes closed and his third eye open when he died.
He had a Facebook page I’m told but I didn’t (well, not until now) so I didn’t visit his.
Still, didn’t he live out loud for us through his music?
Wasn’t he as demonstrative as possible on video?
My dad and I went to see the 1987 Sign O’ The Times concert film at a Cleveland art house theatre
on a weekend home and I wished I hadn’t been sitting there during part of it – OMG!
Embarrassed because I was with my dad and couldn’t fully appreciate the performance. Ha!
I was 28. As we left the theater, Daddy said good movie. I agreed and we never spoke of it again.
In a decades long career, Prince has described every emotion,
every joy, every pain, lost love, found love,
boring job:
“working part time in a five and dime…
seems that I was busy doing something close to nothing
but different from the day before…”
(“Raspberry Beret”, Around The World In A Day, 1985)
lonely night:
“It’s 2 o’clock in the morning and I just can’t sleep
Outside the rain is pourin’, I’m lonely as can be
Maybe tonight’ll be different than the nights before
I need to feel someone beside me, I can’t be alone no more…
This big ol’ world can be so empty livin’ in it all alone
I realize, in its best disguise, a pretty house don’t make a home
There’s a hunger deep inside of me, how the fire burns
I wanna give good love to someone and get good love in return, oh
Tonight I wanna be somebody’s somebody, Tonight I wanna belong to someone”
(Somebody’s Somebody, Emancipation, 1996)
wish:
“This could be us, But you be playin’
This could be us, But you keep on foolin’ around
You’re the cage to my dove, I’m just saying
Forever and ever in love…
Oh baby… Yeah, this could be us”
(This Could B Us, Art Official Age, 2014 and HitNRun Phase One, 2015 remix)
and he took us soul searching:
“What if time’s only reason was to give us all somethin’ to fear?
And if so y’all, the end of the journey’s so clear.
Questionnaire, what did you stand for?
Questionnaire, who did you save?
When it gets right down to the -wait a minute
When it gets right down to the nitty of the gritty
When it gets right down to it –
Did you take more than you gave?”
(The Truth title cut, 1997 and Crystal Ball 3rd cd, 1998)
No topic was ever off limits,
and no genre unexplored — blues, jazz, rock, r&b, funk, hip-hop, pop –
he even went tropical with a reggae groove on “the Sun, the Moon, and Stars”
(Rave un2 the Joy fantastic, 1999 and Rave in2 the Joy fantastic (remixes), 2001).
I heard him play a little country once, and a little go-go too, but only in concert.
I never made it to Paisley Park.
In spite of the fan club invitations, and later, Twitter announcements.
I wasn’t able to pull the trigger on an opportunity since “Minny” is more than a drive.
Of course, that didn’t stop me from trying,
checking flight schedules, arranging days off and a work replacement,
but I couldn’t make it happen with usually a four to 10 days notice.
If it becomes a museum, I’ll be there.
I did manage to visit one of his Glam Slam clubs, when they were open, in Miami.
Tight!!
I wouldn’t have expected anything less from a Prince property.
The place had apparently been owned by Al Capone at some point in the past.
A lot of the art deco flavor was still there, bench seating wrapped around columns,
private boxes off the sides of slanting staircases that hugged the main floor –
but the light grid was a show all its own.
As the night progressed, the lighting schemes got more intense
employing different laser effects along the way and the grid slowly descended over time.
Talk about creating a frenzy!
Best club light show, EVER!
The last time I saw Prince jump up on a piano was in NYC during the Welcome 2 America Tour.
Here is a pic of the two of us from the second show I attended.
I’m in the circle highlight.
I had communicated with God over the years how I’d love to take a picture with Prince
and this is how he fulfilled that request.
God has a sense of humor!
He came through so I’m not mad at him.
I asked to sing with Prince too.
I guess doing it along with thousands of others has to count.
Being specific is the lesson I’ve learned. Ha!
I was also in the audience the night
Prince kicked Kim Kardashian off the stage for not dancing.
What I’ve noticed in the recently recirculated (edited) videos of the encounter
is how the thing he said after she exited has been omitted.
I heard it along with the rest of the sold out Madison Square Garden crowd.
“Welcome to America, where you can be rich and famous for doing nothing.”
The crowd went, “Ohhhh!” ouch!
I guess I wouldn’t want anybody to remember that part either.
The very last time I saw Prince in concert was the HitNRun Tour, June 14, 2015.
For the first show, my vantage point was a mid-rise orchestra center seat.
The audio cables from the stage were right at my feet,
the love symbol mic just in front of me with Prince directly behind it.
The first show was VERY strict about cell phones.
He wanted us to concentrate on the music,
enjoy the show with our eyes and ears
instead of trying to photograph it or record it,
under threat of ejection –
which was a verbally administered warning upon admittance,
then handed out to each individual in print,
and later announced prior to the start of the concert –
pretty clear on NO CELL PHONES and NO photos.
(Don’t act like you didn’t know, okay?!)
For the second show, I splurged and got a third row seat on the aisle.
Halfway through the late show, he had us turn on our cell phones
and light up the house, reminiscent of the ‘70s when people held up their lighters
at a concert respectfully requesting an encore from the performers.
He knew once we had the phones out,
photos and videos were going to happen but he was cool with it.
Then – while we were jamming and Prince was playing the guitar,
there was some keyboard action going on –
I remember the guy next to me commenting
about Prince not having a keyboard player and me agreeing –
when lo and behold the lights go up on the keys after about three songs to reveal STEVIE!!
What?!!
Then, Prince introduces him and Stevie does a set while Prince plays backup on guitar.
Yes – that will be unforgettable.
Quite honestly, having seen Prince in every incarnation –
translation: hairdo and method of dress or undress and backing band members –
as he recreated himself over the years,
he did seem a little frail that night but I chalked it up to tired.
With the mic stand positioned front and center, he didn’t need to do much moving around
plus he was really spending a lot of time during those performances showcasing his band, ThirdEyeGirl, and solo artists Judith Hill, and Liv Warfield (awesome!).
He did his due diligence with the things fans always want to hear of course
and as usual expected us to participate.
Just as his musical expression matured over the years
from “in your face” to more subtle ways of saying the same kinds of things,
it occurs to me that at some point Prince had begun to acknowledge his aging physically,
like we all must, but instead of quitting he just decided to simplify.
First the stationary mic, then the Piano And A Microphone tour.
We all need to sit down sometimes.
Besides, what could be better than having Prince sit and play and sing to you
or conduct a group sing-a-long for a few hours like you were in his living room
before the days of television when people had to entertain themselves?
That’s just so personal, even if you are one among many other best friends.
The saddest part for me in all of this was when I heard he had died alone.
With all of the people who loved him as a person, a friend, a musician, a star,
it broke my heart no one was there to at least hold his hand on the way across to the other side
and actually tell him they loved him.
The irony of the elevator was not lost on me,
as well as the lyrics from “Sometimes It Snows In April” (Parade, 1986)
making it all that much sadder.
The beautiful part is Prince is being embraced in heavenly arms right now,
having shown great love and respect for God and an afterlife,
during his time on this earth.
“There will be a new city with streets of gold
The young so educated they never grow old
And… there will be no death for with every breath
A voice of many colors sings a song
That’s so bold…” (7, O(+>*, 1992)
I believe there is a mention of the Creator on every one of his albums.
I’ll have to start at number one and listen to every cut to confirm this.
(no small feat but certainly not a chore…on my to do list anyway)
I’ll get back to you if it’s not true.
I know you’ve heard he didn’t leave a will
and that seems contrary to being business savvy…
but I say he doesn’t need it now and
I say he foreshadowed on more than one occasion
when asked about his “vault” of yet to be heard already complete songs and albums:
“somebody will release them”**.
I’m praying it will be done with the perfection he always required
and I plan to buy every single one.
Rest In Peace Prince. Nothing Compares 2 U.
*O(+> was the name Prince chose for himself during his fight with Warner Brothers. It is the title of his 14th studio album and is also referred to as the Love Symbol.
**Donatella Versace used some previously unreleased Prince music for the latest runway show featuring her Spring 2017 men’s line. According to sources, he sent her music throughout their friendship. It’s worth a listen.